Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, “Did Santa get you that?” “Yes,” replies the little girl. “Well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year!” and fines her $5.
The little girl looks up at the cop and says, “Nice horse you’ve got there, did Santa bring you that?” The cop chuckles and that?” The cop chuckles and replies, “He sure did!” “Well,” says the little girl, “Next year tell Santa that the d*ck goes under the horse, not on top of it!”
The city is holding its breath. One call, one choice, and millions of lives tilt toward mercy or punishment. Zohran Mamdani stares at the phone, knowing any…
The sprouts looked wrong. Not just old-food wrong—something-else-is-happening wrong. You meant to throw together a lazy dinner, not question whether your potatoes were quietly turning toxic on…
His laugh died first. The punchlines that once slipped so easily from his tongue shattered in the blue wash of patrol lights, leaving only the taste of…
The door didn’t close; it slammed. Not just on her, but on every name that never made it into evidence. The verdict came wrapped like closure, but…
The applause died faster than their heartbeats. They smiled for the cameras, but the air tasted like metal and old lies. Outside, people buried their dead; inside,…
He thought he was winning. He thought numbers, titles, and square footage meant victory. At the kitchen island where they once planned a life, he itemized their…